(The camera fades to a wide hallway backstage of the Civic Center. The camera pans in on "The Virus" Matthew Engel as he walks, a black bag on his right shoulder, to his locker room. He makes a quick turn down the corridor, almost colliding with Psychoduck. The two are inches from each other, but Duck backs away slowly. Now, within a few feet away from each other, Psychoduck smirks and speaks.)
Psychoduck: Well, well, Engel, you don't cease to amaze me. Had you ran into me just now I would've been forcen to beat you to a bloody pulp... again.
Virus: Again? No, I don't see that possibly happening again, Duck.
Psychoduck: According to the scars and cuts across your face and upper body, I do see that as very possible.
(Psychoduck begins to point out the major scars and laughs. He looks around the head of Virus to see that massive bruise from his Migration into the cinder block. Virus pushes a nasty bruise on the chest and ribcage area of Duck.)
Virus: Bare in mind, Duck, you also can be bruised, battered, bloodied. Did that Cash Splash hurt? I hope so.
(Duck gives in to the pain by Virus' finger. He knocks his finger away.)
Duck: I won't forget it, that's for sure. As a matter of fact, I happen to have my nun chucks right here, ready to bloody you up, AGAIN
Virus: You better concentrate on Destiny and not me tonight, Duck. I'd hate to see you lose to someone that's lesser than both of us.
Duck: You're right, he's a pitiful excuse for a wrestler. Say... didn't he beat you a few weeks back?
Virus: Some call it luck, I call it a miracle.
(Duck rolls his eyes.)
Duck: Well , for your information... buddy... I am focused on my match, very much so in fact. Heed your own, Matt... cause you'd better be focused on your TWO matches tonight and not on me...and how I destroyed you with my nun chucks. Bleed much, do you?
Virus: I'd watch your mouth Duck. You're not hiding behind a camera anymore.
(Duck begins to raise his right arm slowly, which contain the nun chucks.)
Duck: Ha, empty threats.
Virus: You'll regret saying that. Nothing that comes from my mouth is empty.
(Virus walks in the direction he was going, knocking his left shoulder with Duck's left shoulder. With Virus's back to Duck, Duck raises his nun chucks up, but then lowers his guard. He shrugs his shoulders and walks back to where he was going. We then go to the main arena, where the pyros explode as "Poem" by Taproot plays throughout the arena. We then go live to the commentary position, for Brent Vans and Christopher Curtis.)
Curtis: WELCOME EVERYONE TO THE HARTFORD CIVIC CENTER FOR OKTOBERFEST! Hello everyone I am Christopher Curtis...
Vans: And I am the one...
Curtis: And fortuntaely...
Vans: ...and only...Brent Vans.
Curtis: All kidding aside Brent, tonight is going to be a huge night. It's time for Battlecade.
Vans: One of the most dangerous matches in the UHWA will be happening tonight, as TED defends against Jimmy Allen, Black Jack Bowers and Moke Doshkey.
Curtis: This will be one hell of a match in my opinion.
Vans: I'm looking forward to it. But let's not forget all the titles are on the line tonight as well.
Curtis: Well, we look set to have a great night ahead of us, and our first match is about ready to get underway.
JESTER VS. GREG HALSTON
LOPEZ: Our first match, is a singles match scheduled for one fall. Introducing first...
("Breathe" by Prodigy plays and Greg Halston comes to the ring, followed by Bryan Mitchell. Both men have Haliburton briefcases and black Oakleys over their eyes)
LOPEZ: to be accompanied to the ring by Bryan Mitchell, standing 6'7" and weighing in at 270lbs... from Brooklyn, New York... GREG HALSTON!
(The arena launches into a chorus of boos, as both men climb into the ring, salute the crowd, Halston then removes his glasses and prepares for the match, as Mitchell hops out to ringside)
Vans: I like this guy.
Curtis: Why?
Vans: I dunno... I just do... there's something about him.
LOPEZ: and his opponent...
("Send in the Clowns" by Cold hits the PA and the lights go dark. Jester comes to the ring, juggling five balls in the air. He spins around a few times, laughing to himself, when he lets all five balls fall in front of him, causing five mini explosions to appear at his feet)
LOPEZ: Standing 6 foot even, weighing in at 218lbs, from parts unknown... JESTERRRR!
( Jester walks to the ring and dives under the top rope. He rears back and laughs maniacally, before the lights come back up. The crowds boos still echo)
Curtis: Doesn't seem like the crowd like either of these guys, Brent.
Vans: Well they're all stupid.
Curtis: how can you justify that comment?
Vans: listen to the noises they're making when two superstars stand in the ring... I think my point is proven.
*DING DING*
Curtis: Well, looks like we're gonna get underway. Vans: good, this is where these two guys can shut the crowd up.
(Jester and Greg lock up centre ring, Greg easily over powers Jester, throwing him to the floor)
Curtis: Great show of strength by the big man.
(Jester looks a little bewildered as he gets to his feet. He runs at Greg, and slides past him, as Greg lunges and misses)
Vans: Ah, smart move there. Using his speed as an advantage.
Curtis: Cant argue with that.
Vans: so don't try
Curtis: I'm not.
Vans: you are.
Curtis: I'm no...
Vans: look, you're doing it right now!
(In the ring, Jester continues to run and dodge the attacks of Greg. Greg starts to look frustrated. Jester runs at him again, but instead of lunging, Greg sidesteps into the path of Jester, and grabs him as he tries to slide. Greg wraps his hands around Jesters throat, and holds him high in the air)
Curtis: Things are not looking good for Jester in the early going...
(Jester struggles to trya dn break free, but can't get Greg to release his hold. As Jester starts to fade, he reaches down and grabs the tie of Greg, and tightens the noose in it, stangling Greg in the process. Greg starts to choke, as he drops Jester to the floor.)
Vans: They weren't going well, no. Of course, with innovative moves like that, Jesters shooting for the top in this federation. Being in an opening match is but a speed bump on the road to paradise... hmm.. that's good. Someone write that down.
(Jester uses his brief break to get some energy back. Knowing that he cant take Greg out with hand to hand fighting, Jester slides out of the ring, walks over to the crowd and grabs himself a chair. He slides back in, and stalks Greg. As Greg turns around, Jester hits him with a low blow, causing him to bend over. Jester follows up with 3 chair shots to the back, before going for the pin)
1 . . . 2 . KICk OUT!
Vans: Close call there.. my boy almost won this one.
Curtis: Your boy, I thought you liked Greg..
Vans: there's a fine line between liking someone, and them being your boy, Chris
Curtis: Well not being the kind to play favorites, I wouldn't know.
Vans: you should read the book on it, it's good stuff.
Curtis: There's a book?
Vans: yeah, Favoratism For Dummies.. I have a spare copy if you want.
Curtis: no, you're alright... thanks anyway.
(In the ring, Jester has grabbed hold of his chair again, and goes to work delivering some violent shots to the kidneys of Greg. With Greg bending over in agony, Jester climbs the top rope)
Curtis: I think we may see the Jokers Wild here... seems to be setting up for it.
(Jester prepares himself, before taking flight and jumping at, and over, Greg. He grabs his waist on the way, and goes for the sunset flip. Lying on the floor now, Jester struggle to try and pull Greg over. Greg laughs, before reaching down, and grabbing Jester by the side of his head. He slides him forward, through his legs, and throws him into the air, catching him sidewards on as he drops back down, and converting it into a powerbomb)
Curtis: oh my!
Vans: now THAT'S why I chose this guy to win.
Curtis: you just said you chose Jester...
Vans: still haven't read that book I see... see, what you got from me was something called a red earring.
Curtis: you mean red hearing.
Vans: yeah... exactly... red earring.
(with Jester lying on the mat, holding his back, Greg makes his way over to the chair)
Curtis: Big mistake here, Greg should go for the pin.
(Greg grabs Jester, and stands him up. Jester staggers around a little, as Greg lines up a chair shot)
Curtis: ooh, a swing and a miss.
(Greg tries to go for another attack, but Jester ducks before dropkicking the chair into Gregs face)
Curtis: I think he knocked him out.
Vans: no way. It was one chair shot, he's fine.
(Jester grabs the chair and lays it flat across the chest neck and face of Greg. He makes his way back to the corner, and climbs the ropes)
Curtis: I don't like the looks of this.
(Jester puts his hands on his hips, leans back and laughs manically. He regains his composure, before jumping, doing a somersault in the air, and leg dropping the chair across Gregs face and upper body)
Curtis: I don't believe it... he was knocked out.
Vans: Of course, there's nothing Jester can't do. He's the next champ ya know, being saying so since the start.
Curtis: so the cheering for Halston was a red earring?
Vans: that's it, now you're starting to understand.
(Jester rolls around holding his leg for a short time, before scrambling over Gregs body, as the Ref makes the count)
1 . . . 2 . . . 3!
DING DING DING!
LOPEZ: Here is your winner, JESTERRRR!
(Jester rolls off of Greg and runs up the rampway, celebrating on the way as he does so, as Greg is helped out of the ring by Brian)
Curtis: Well, the guy did it.
Vans: As I said he would, ya know, it's too bad he beat Greg so quickly and easily... that Jesters got an impressive Dragon-rana type move. But I'm sure he'll save that for a champion, who deserves that kinda attention.
Curtis: you saying Greg wasn't deserved of being in the ring with Jester?
Vans: Not in the slightest.
Curtis: I thought he gave Jester a good match...
Vans: He got knocked out with a chair shot to the face!
Curtis: But he'd already suffered 3 to the back earlier... and I think the corner of the chair hit his temple.
Vans: don't make excuses for the man... I'm sure a loser like him can make them all on his own.
(We go backstage to find Jason Robards talking on the phone.)
Robards: Yes...look no I haven't gotten them into the federation...I don't care how many rumors you've heard, they still haven't signed...yeah...bye.
(Robards sighs to himself as we go to the ringside area.)
TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH
Curtis: time now for our tag title clash.
LOPEZ: Ladies and Gentleman, out next match is a tag team contest scheduled for one fall, and is to the UHWA TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP.
(huge pop from the crowd)
LOPEZ: Introducing first... the challengers.
("Aerials" by System of a Down plays over the PA as Trey Lorenzo makes his way to the ring with his partner, Nomad. Trey is dressed with a black trenchcoat over his ring attire, and is wearing black shades. A strobelight goes off as Trey fires up the crowd, and runs down to the ring. Nomad following closely behind)
LOPEZ: At a combined weight of 442lbs... TREY LORENZO AND NICHOLAS "THE NOMAD" GHOULD
(Trey dives in under the bottom rope and stays on his stomach for a moment, surveying the crowd, before getting to his feet and climbing to the middle rope. He salutes the crowd then does a backflip back into the ring, wear he removes his sunglasses and trench coat. Meanwhile Ghould walks around to the other side of the ring, and simply climbs the steps into the ring. The two men walk to their corners and await the start of the match)
LOPEZ: and their opponents...
("Your World" by Professional Murder Music hits over the PA-system... Cheers start to build through the arena as the house lights meld into a dark green color...)
Curtis: couple of crowd favourites here... great champions.
(McCade pushes through the curtains, Virus stands at his side, a cold look on their faces. McCades hair flowing just to the tip of his shoulders. Dressed in a black, leather vest, dark cargo pants, and a pair of dark sunglasses he raises his hand to the fans. Cheers follow the gesture...Virus does the same gesture, and gets a slightly quieter reaction. The two men take a look around the arena, a look of uncertainity on their faces...they stroll down to ringside.. Blue pyros start to erupt as they walk...)
LOPEZ: At combined weight of 441lbs, they are the UHWA TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS... "THE BLACK MANTIS" RYAN MCCADE.. and " THE VIRUS" MATTHEW.. ENGEL!!!
(McCade reaches ringside, accompanied by cheers, and handing his vest and sunglasses over to the ring girl...he takes a moment to look out at the crowd... McCade smirks and slides in as a few green and golden pyro's shoot off in the entry way. He looks around the arena with his right fist clenched in the air.. Virus walks over to the ring girl, takes the glasses from her, and instead gives them to a small girl in the front row, which gets a cheer of approval from the fans nearby. McCade looks down at Virus, slightly annoyed. Virus slides into the ring, and hands his title to the ref. McCade does the same with his title, as the music fades)
Curtis: ooh, McCade not happy about that.
Vans: I don't blame him... those were nice shades.
(The two teams get inot their corners, McCade and Ghould step outside)
Curtis: Looks like Virus and Trey will be starting this competition off.
*DING DING*
Curtis: And here we go.
(Virus and Trey lock up, with Virus getting the advantage and putting Trey in a headlock. Trey breaks free though, and spins around Virus, putting him in a reverse waist lock. Elbows to the head by Virus, who reverses the move himself, into his own reverse waist lock. Trey goes for the elbows but Virus ducks, before locking his hips and going for a release German suplex, Trey flipping in the air, and just managing to land on his feet. The two men stare at each other as the crowd give a loud round of applause)
Curtis: Great action early one, the crowd really impressed with that exchange... this looks set to be a thrilling encounter, doesn't it Brent?
Vans: zzzz
Curtis: Brent, stop being an idiot.
Vans: just tell me when it gets exciting...
Curtis: didn't you just see what happened?
Vans: did a Gillette come down and attack someone?
Curtis: no...
Vans: zzzz
(Back to the action, and Trey has Virus in an armbar. Virus handsprings his way out of it, only to be met with a reverse heel kick to the face by Trey. Trey goes for the immediate cover, but doesn't even get a one count. Trey pulls Virus to his feet, and starts to work on Virus's body, still damaged from the week before)
Curtis: smart work here by Trey...
Vans: zzzzz.
Curtis: ya know... I'm just gonna unplug your head set.
(we hear the sound of Vans:' headset being unplugged as Trey puts Virus in another armbar, and leads him over to the corner, where he tags in Ghould. Ghould makes quick with a kick to the ribs, that sends Virus down to the floor. Ghould goes for the leglock, but Virus manages to scramble free. Virus makes his way to his corner and goes for a tag, but is stopped by Ghould, who spins him around and nails him with a right hand. Virus staggers back, before hitting back with his own. The two exchange blows, with Virus getting the upper hand, he hits ghould with two straight shots to the draw, before pulling back and nailing him with a knockout blow. Ghould falls to the mat.)
Curtis: this kid shoulda been a boxer.
(Virus walks over to his corner to make the tag, McCade extends his hand, but Virus changes his mind and walks back over to Ghould. He picks him up, hits him in the kidneys, and follows it up with a snap suplex. Virus goes for the cover, but Trey runs in to make the save. Virus gets to his feet, and turns his attention to Trey, he backs him into the corner and starts laying into him. Ghould gets to his feet and charges at Virus from behind, but Virus hears him coming and steps aside, letting Ghould spear his partner. Trey falls to the, with Ghould apologising. Virus wastes no time, and kicks Ghould in the gut, before dropping him with a cradle DDT. He picks up Trey, and slams him on top the fallen Ghould, before climbing the top rope. Virus raises his arm and gets a huge cheer from the crowd, before hitting the Cash Splash onto both me)
Curtis: Holy Be-Jesus.
(Virus kicks Trey out of the ring, and makes the pin)
1 . . . 2 . . . 3
*DING DING DING*
LOPEZ: here are your winners, and STILL UHWA TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS... "THE VIRUS" MATTHEW ENGEL, AND "THE BLACK MANTIS" RYAN MCCADE!!
("This Love" by Pantera starts to blast out of the PA sytem, as Virus grabs his belt and heads to the back. McCades gets his belt handed to him, and walks back, seemingly disappointed at not being in the match)
Curtis:Wow, great performance by Virus, wouldn't you say? ...
Curtis: I know! He took this match into his own control... dominating performance. ...
Curtis: No, I doubt there's too much trouble for those two. Virus was probbly sending a message to Thunderwolf. Him and ryan are related you know. *click*
Vans: damn thing... what are you blabbering about, Chris?
Curtis: Oh, you're back on... um..good... I was talking about nothing. Just the great match we just saw... Well, some of us saw.
Vans: Virus get beaten up again?
Curtis: Quite the opposite, it was a dominating performance from him. He kicked some ass.
Vans: pinch me.
Curtis: What?
Vans: pinch me...
Curtis: why?
Vans: Virus kicked some ass, I gotta be dreaming or something...
Curtis: riiight.
***
Tune in on October 28th for W4F Royal Rampage
***
Curtis: I think we're about ready for our next match... with the returning, Duncan Aries.
Vans: whats the bet he's upped and left again before the end of the night.
Curtis: alright, I'll wager ya 10 bucks he don't leave before the end of the night.
Vans: Deal!
LOPEZ: Our next contest is a singles bout, scheduled for one fall.
("Bartender" by hed PE plays over the PA and a pink strobelight begins flashing throughout the arena. Pyros explode all around the entranceway, and golden confetti rains down from the heavens. David DuBouist walks out with a sparkling silver robe over his ring attire, and sunglasses over his eyes. He waves to the crowd and smiles arrogantly.) LOPEZ: Introducing first, weighing in at 232lbs, and standing at 6 foot 2inches, from Las Vegas, Nevada... DAZZLING... DAVID.. DUBOIST!!! (David DuBouist walks to the ring, amidst a chorus of boos. He dives in under the top rope and the moment he steps up four pyros explode from the ringposts, and David throws up his arms. David then removes his robe and sunglasses as he waits for his opponent.)
LOPEZ: and his opponent...
(We hear Duncans' voice says the words "Did you love? Were you loved? Did you grow up? Did you do as you said you would? Were you strong? Were you sung? Not anymore...Never again...Not in your wildest dreams...")
(Duncan emerges with Nocturnal John at his side as his voice trails off on the video screen. "Points of Authority" by Linkin Park blares as Duncan looks at the crowd who give him a mixed reaction.)
LOPEZ: to be accompanied to the ring by Nocturnal John... standing at 6'3" and weighing 240lbs, from San Diego, California... "THE SPADE" DUNCAN ARIES!!
(Duncan smirks a bit as he makes his way down to ring side, enters the ring and takes off his jacket. He lays it down on the mat and kicks it away as he shadow boxes) getting ready for the match.]
Curtis: Duncans first match back, and he looks in great shape.
Vans: Duboist is gonna kick his ass.
Curtis: you think ring rust will play a factor then?
Vans: shhh... keep it down about the ring rust, jeez, if the wrestler knew that ring was rusty we'd have all kinds of complaints.
Curtis: no you idiot, I mean for Duncan... been out of the ring for a brief time, you think that's why he'll lose?
Vans: oh... right... um, no. He'll just lose cause Duboist is the man.... *whistles* GO DUBOIST, YOU RULE!
( Duboist looks over at Brent and smiles, uncomfortably.)
*DING DING*
(With Duboist still looking easily at Brent, Duncan takes advantage and charges in with a chop block to Duboists legs, causing him to falls to the floor. Duncan grabs the top rope for leverage as he lays some viscious stomps in on Duboists upper back. Duncan pulls Duboist to his feet, scoops him up and delivers back breaker. Duncan pulls him to his feet once more, and irsih whips him, chest first, into the turnbuckles... following in with a knee to the lower back. Duboist drops to the floor, and rolls out of the ring to regroup, clutching at his back as he does so)
Curtis: Impressive start by Duncan, he's certainly come back with a lot of fight in him. Looks to be more on edge, and aggressive. His street fighting routes showing through agressively.
Vans: god Chris, why don't ya just marry him..
Curtis: Hey I'm just saying that Duncan's started well... and he looks good in the early going.
Vans: bah. False sense of Security, that's what it is. Nothing more, nothing less
(Duboist surveys Duncan in the ring, before going under the ring)
Curtis: where the hell is he going?
(Duboist comes out at the other suide of the ring, gets to his feet, and smiles and taps the side of his ehad with his finger. Suggesting that he's smart, he turns around, only to be met with a baseball slide to the face from Aries. Duncan gets out of the ring, picks up Duboist, throws him back in the ring, slides in himself and goes for the pin)
1 . . . 2 . KICK OUT!
Curtis: Close call already.
Vans: I see his false sense of security has affected you too. Excellent.
(Duncan gets to his feet, and pulls Duboist up. Duncan signals to the crowd that he's gooing to end it, but he takes too long and Duboist nauils him with a low blow. With Duncan keeled over, Duboist takes two steps back, then hits him in the face with a football kick. Duncan goes to the floor, clutching his nose)
Curtis: that was viscious.
Vans: no my friend, that was beautiful... and look, he's bleeding... it's great!
(Duboist doesn't waste anytime, and mounts Aries, before pounding on his face with viscious lefts and rights.)
Curtis: Duboist taking a leaf out of Duncans book
Vans: How'd ya figure that? Duncan hasn't had any offence yet
Curtis: except for the first few minutes... and I meant because Duncan is a former street fighter.
(Duboist gets off of Aries, and pulls him to his feet. Aries' face dripping with blood)
Curtis: this match has certainly taken a turn for the worse for Aries.
(Duboist looks to end the match, and sets Aries up for The Dazzling End. But as he goes to hit it, Aries grabs hold of the ropes, causing Duboist to just fall to the floor. Duncan instinctively punces on Duboist, and starts with the face punches of his own. Stopping after 3 punches, to wipe the blood from his face, before continuing)
Curtis: wow, and just like that, it's back in his favor.
(Duncan gets off Duboist, who is now bleeding lightly himself. Duboist staggers to his feet, and swings at Duncan, who dodges the punch with cat like reflexes. Duncan grabs the outstretched arm of Duboist, twists it into an armbar, steps over it with one leg. Duncan closes his legs, locking Duboists arms in place, he then leans back, and wraps his arms around Duboists neck. He leans side to side, before hopping off the flor, and leaning sidewards, throwing the apir of them to the floor, with Duncan holding Duboist in a modified Crippler Crossface)
Curtis: Amazing innovation
Vans: but look at Duboist, refusing to give up.
(Duncan growing frutstrated with Duboist refusing to submit, lets go of the move and gets to his feet, he starts kicking out at the bottom rope. From out of no where, Duboist connects with a leg sweep, causing Duncan to fall over the side of Duboist, who wraps him up in a small package)
1 . . . 2 . .
(Duncan grabs Duboits head and rols through sidewards, getting his own small package, he grabs the rope for leverage as the ref counts)
1 . . . 2 . . . 3
*DING DING DING*
LOPEZ: Here is your winner... DUNCAN "THE SPADE" ARIES!!!
( Duncan slides out of the ring, and makes his way back to the dressing rooms with John, celebrating as they leave. Duboist is left fuming in the ring)
Curtis: Impressive return match for Duncan
Vans: Impressive?!?!? He cheated!
Curtis: you're just upset cause you haven't chosen a single guy to win, who has won, yet.
Vans: Joker...
Curtis: But you picked Greg first.
Vans: Herring, remember... anyway... Psychoducks coming up soon. He'll win.
Curtis: Chances seem likely, with his recent form.
Vans: Yup... oh, by the way, you owe me 10 bucks.
Curtis: why?
Vans: Duncans leaving... right now.
Curtis: but he's not leaving the fed... just ringside.
Vans: nah ah... I never once mentioned leaving the fed, just leaving... now... hand over the cash
Curtis: *mumbles*
(We go backstage where Dusty is preparing for his NA Title Match. In walks Natalie, with an angry look on her face.)
Dusty: Hey 'lie, what's wrong with you?
(Suddenly out of nowhere, Natalie slaps Dusty in the face and storms off with tears in her eyes. Dusty rushes off after her.)
Curtis: What the hell???
Vans: YES1 Finally something went wrong for that damn Texan!
HARDCORE TITLE MATCH!
Lopez: Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the UHWA Hardcore Championship! Introducing first...the challenger...
(The lights go down, and a red pentagram is projected on the entryway. A chant of "Nunc Mortem Ventiam" goes up from the background. The chant eventually fades out and there is a loud explosion, and smoke surrounds the pentagram as Destiny emerges from under the entryway through the pentagram, Demona in his arms. "Mudshovel" by Staind begins to play as Destiny walks out of the pentagram and poses for the crowd. He walks to the ring with Demona trailing behind him. )
Lopez: To be accompanied to the ring by Demona Occultica...from Parts Unknown...weighing in at 266 pounds...DESTINY!!!
(Demona goes to the corner and Destiny climbs in the ring. Destiny poses for the crowd again, as a pentagram ignites behind him. Eventually "Mudshovel" by Staind goes away and the flaming pentagram rises to the heavens. )
Lopez: And his opponent...
[The arena lights dim down into darkness, save for a single spotlight, that shines on the entranceway. Through the entrance way, comes a large radio control truck, with Buttercup stuck on top of it. The car does some donuts before driving down the entrance ramp. As the car does so, pyros explode behind it, all the way down. The car skids at the end, and turns to face the entrance. The lights all go out. Ducks voice can be heard.]
"Ever wanted to part of something..." "Ever wanted to know you'll be remembered after death..." "I know I have..." "I know I will..." "Cause I'm better than you..." "All of you..." "Coming from nothing..." "To having everything I ever wanted..." "How could I not be remembered..." "I can't not be..." "And none of you..." "Can ever change that"
[The lights on the car light up, barely able to light 6 inches infront of the vehicle. It drives back up the ramp, spins 180 degrees again, before honking its horn. As it does so, 5 huge pyros explode on stage and "Born with Nothing, Die with Everything" by Papa Roach blasts out of the PA system. The arena fills with red and blue lights, as a sheet of ivy drops over the entrance way. A spotlight focuses on it, as a sword rips through, slashing the ivy in half. As it drops to the floor, through the entranceway steps Psychoduck, dressed in his usual entrance attire, with a radio control in his hand, the sword in his other. With the hand with the sword in, he reaches back and takes Jennelles hand, leading her though the entranceway, Jennelle has Ducks hardcore title on her shoulder. Duck gives Jennelle his sword, and walks over to Buttercup. He unstraps her, picks her up. And then uses the control to drive the car through the entrance, throwing the control back there after it's through. Duck stands back next to Jennelle, takes his title from her and holds it high in the air with one hand.] [The crowd give a mixed reaction] [ Duck gives Jennelle the title, and takes her hand, as the two of them, and Buttercup,make their way to the ring. As Duck gets closer to the cameras, the faded bruising of his battle last week can be seen]
Lopez: To be accompanied to the ring by Jennelle...from the Pond...weighing in at 247 pounds...THE UHWA HARDCORE CHAMPION...PSYCHODUCK!!!
[As theyreach ringside, they make their way around to the commentary position. Duck sits Buttercup on the table. He whisprs something to her, and then climbs in the ring. He poses atop the turnbuckle briefly, before removing his armour, and handing it down to Jennelle... after she first gives the title belt to a ring attendant] [Duck stands in his corner, limbers up a little, and prepares for the match to start as his music fades out]
Curtis: For some odd reason that doll is giving me bad vibes.
Vans: Don't mind him Buttercup...he's been a bit cranky recently.
Curtis: You do know that thing can't talk right?
Vans: Tell that to Psychoduck...
(The bell rings and we are underway. Psychoduck darts around Destiny as he tries a waistlock from behind, but Destiny is able to reverse it. Psychoduck hooks Destiny in a simple headlock, and takes him over with a headlock takedown. Destiny kicks out of the move and quickly gets to his feet and drops Psychoduck with a clothesline.)
Curtis: Psychoduck's still pretty banged up...Destiny had better take advantage of that.
Vans: Nice to see you giving favorites there Chris.
Curtis: Who said I was doing that....on the inverse Psychoduck had better try anything to avoid the power of Destiny.
Vans: Herring...
(Destiny picks up Psychoduck and backs him into the corner and begins to lay in reverse knife edge chops. Destiny lifts Psychoduck onto the top rope and signals for an end.)
Curtis: Destiny is trying to end this early.
(Destiny tries The Overture, but Duck drops his foot so he can hook it in under the turnbuckle, and cant be lifted. Destiny tries again, still no go. Duck unhooks his arm, and punches Destiny in the stomach twice, and then a third time, which causes Destiny to fall back to the mat.)
Vans: I told you Duck is a genius...yes that's right Buttercup I did say that always.
Curtis: Please
(With Destiny lying down in the corner of the ring, and Duck above him on the turnbuckle. Duck thinks over his options, he turns his back to the ring, steadies himself and goes for the moonsault. Taking tpoo long to think about it though give Destiny time to roll out of the way, Duck comes down hitting nothing mat. Duck rolls around on the floor, clutching his chest and ribs. Jennelles runs around to where Duck is, and as he tries to get to his feet, she seems to be telling him to calm down.)
Curtis: Psychoduck doesn't seem to remember he's hurt here.
Vans: And now what is Demona doing???
(Demona goes over and grabs Jennelle and holds her by the hair. She begins to scratch and claw at Jennelle, before she herself is taken by Duck by the hair, lifted, and slammed to the ground. Psychoduck winks at Jennelle, who smiles, and as Duck turns around, he is met by a clothesline through the middle rope by Destiny.)
Curtis: Holy cow!
Vans: Destiny I guess can fly...oh man I can't lose again.
(Destiny picks up Duck and rams his back into the mat hard. Destiny then smiles to the crowd as he goes over and grabs Psychoduck again. Destiny tries to whip Duck into the steel steps, but Duck reverses and Destiny hits hard. Duck picks up Destiny and throws him into the ring. He lifts up the apron, and starts digging out toys from under the ring. Eventually coming out with a bag, and a metal shield with a square cut out of it. Duck walks over to Buttercup, and puts the metal shield in front of her, with her eyes at the level of the hole so she can see through it. Duck gives her a thumbs up, and slides into the ring, where Destiny is getting to his feet. Duck opens the bag, as he walks over to Destiny. Destiny lunges at Duck and hits him square in the draw, Duck drops the bag, and a bunch of tacs fall out. Destiny and Duck exchange blows, with Destiny getting the upper hand. He whips Duck off the ropes, as Duck comes back Destiny drops to the floor, just to the side of the tacs. Duck hops over and boucnes off the other ropes, as he returns Destiny goes for the leap frog, But Duck doesn't Duck, instead he runs straight into Destiny and catches on his shoulder. Duck gets a tight hold of Destiny waist, and then whips him down, so that Destinys' head is level with Ducks knees. Duck turns slightly, postioning himself over the tacs, and delivers a violent Hangmans DDT onto the tacs. The move taking energy out of Duck too, causes him to fall sidewards, and hit a few tacs himself, which dig into his arm and side. )
Vans: YES! THE KING OF HARDCORE LIVES!!!
Curtis: Well, despite this match, we all wish Duck luck against his opponents in the KoE match at NoA 4. But at this point, Destiny has been busted open!
(Psychoduck slowly rolls over and covers Destiny
1
2
Kickout!
Psychoduck slowly gets to his feet and picks up Destiny. He sets up Destiny and nails him with a release German Suplex. Duck then picks up Destiny and nails him with a release Dragon Suplex. Duck then picks up Destiny and whips him into the corner.Duck gets ahead of steam and charges at him, and goes for a spear, but Destiny sidesteps and Duck crashes shoulder first into the post. Ducks bodys goes limp as he falls out of the ring, screaming in agony. Jennelle drops Ducks armour and sword, and runs over to check on Duck. Again, telling him to calm down. )
Curtis: That is Psychoduck's weakness right there!!!
Vans: Oh man this doesn't look good.
(Psychoduck slowly rolls into the ring from the floor, with Destiny waiting for him holding a steel chair. Destiny winds up and nails Psychoduck with the chair. Destiny then looks around and finds a cloth from Demona. He grbas the cloth and drapes it over the chair, before grabbing a blowtorch from Demona and lighting the cloth on the chair on fire. He goes over and nails Duck across the chest with the burning chair, before chucking it outside of the ring. As Psychoduck screams from the flaming pain, Destiny goes down and goes for the cover...
1
2
Kickout!)
Curtis: Simply amazing!
Vans: Destiny looks pissed off.
(Destiny signals for an end, and goes to lift up Psychoduck. But Psychoduck counters with right hands that stagger Destiny. Duck backs away from Destiny, and reaches into his tights, pulling out what looks like a pair of nunchucks, with 3 bars instead of two. Duck starts to spin them around himself, as he gets ever nearer to Destiny. Destiny hops back to try and avoid being hit, but Duck flicks the weapon out to full length and catches Destiny on the side of the neck. Destiny staggers as Duck gets in closer and starts to the use the weapon to full effect. Beating up and down the sibs of Destiny, before finally flicking one handles around Destinys neck, which he then catches at the opposite side with his other hand. With Destinys head in a makeshift noose, Duck pulls him towards himself, and dleiver a huge headbut to Destinys face. Duck releases the weapon from Desintys neck, as Destiny falls to the floor. Duck then takes his weapon, and twists the 3 bars together, converting it into a bo staff. Duck begins to show of again, as he moves he bar aorund his body in a flurry of spins and twists, before finally lining up a finsihing blow. He stands level with Destinys head, pulls the staff back behind his own head, and goes for the attack. At the last possble second, Destiny rolls over, causing Duck to hit the floor, the tremors sent back through the staff to Ducks arm causes him to drop the weapon, and get his own dose of pain.)
Curtis: There's a small backfire!
Vans: It may cost Duck here...oh no look who's coming to ringside.
(As Destiny struggles to get up and Psychoduck stands beaten, The Virus comes out with his tag team title belt. Virus gets in the ring and Psychoduck stares at him. Virus looks to hit Duck with the title belt, but instead, as soon as Destiny gets to his feet Virus nails Destiny with the title belt! Virus then walks to the back as Psychoduck snarls at him and then covers Destiny...
1
2
SHOULDER UP!
Psychoduck then smiles down the ringside area at Virus, and lifts up Destiny, and nails him with The Migration, holding his shoulder afterwards. He then covers Destiny...
1
2
3!!!)
DING DING DING!
Lopez: Here is your winner...and STILL UHWA HARDCORE CHAMPION...PSYCHODUCK!!!
Vans: WOOHOO...I GOT A WIN!!!
Curtis: A fantastic match, but it still looks like Psychoduck is going to be hurt after this match.
(Jennelle grabs everything of Psychoduck's as Duck heads up the ramp. Backstage, Michael Swarts is standing by with Jimmy Allen.)
Swarts: Will Jimmy, tonight you make your return to the ring...but I've gotta ask you..
Allen: No No No Michael. Not tonight. You see...no fancy questions tonight. Tonight all the talking ends...and I will show the whole world who really deserves to be the world champion. Now if you'll excuse me.
(Jimmy walks off, leaving Michael in the dust.)
NORTH AMERICAN TITLE MATCH
Curtis: Well we were supposed to have the North American Title Match now but...
Vans: That lousy texan Dusty has left the building. So what...we can't have a countout!
Curtis: Well I guess Jim will win via forefit but...
("Sweet Dreams" by Eurythmics begins to play, as Jim Gillette walks to the ring with a smug smile across his face. He climbs in the ring and then talks.)
Gillette: Well...as you can see my opponent is not here tonight so...I WIN!
(The crowd boos.)
Gillette: Oh shut up. You'll all be happy to know that because I came here to fight, I'm not leaving without a fight so Duncan Aries, get your arse out here so I can beat it, just like I did before. Come on now don't be a coward.
(Suddenly, "Crucified" by Sevendust plays and Duncan Aries comes out. Jim motions for him to attack, and Duncan does so and runs in the ring. Jim and Duncan begin trading lefts and rights and fighting, before Edward and Thomas come from the crowd and attack Duncan from behind.)
Curtis: Oh no not this again!
Vans: WAIT LOOK!
(From the backstage area comes The Virus and Ryan McCade out to chase off The Gillettes, they beat down all three of the Gillettes, McCade taking out Thomas, Virus wiping out Edward, and Duncan clotheslining Jim out of the ring. The three brothers regroup as Duncan and company stand tall in the ring.)
***
On November 3rd, 2002, tune in to the BWA's November Reign live on PPV.
***
AOWF IC Title Match
Lopez: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL AND IT IS A TRIPLE THREAT MATCH FOR THE AOWF INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE MATCH! Introducing first...
(The sound of thunder is heard throughout the arena. The lights slowly dim, but before they completely go out, a flash of lightning hits the ADCtron as white fountain pyro's go off next to the entrance. Blue smoke eminates from the back as Nightstryker walks casually through the smoke to the ring. )
Lopez: From Chicago, Illinois...weighing in at 254 pounds...NIGHTSTRYKER!!!
Vans: Wow...he showed.
Curtis: I guess.
Lopez: Challenger #2...
(The lights in the arena go out, "This Love" by PanTera hits, red and silver lights begin flashing around the arena. The Virus comes out and walks along to the music, before throwing his arms up in the air, throwing a cash sign with his hands. He makes his way down the ring, picking out people to shake hands with who seem can roll with him when it comes to money, but ignroes any common folk. )
Lopez: From Oxford, Ohio...weighing in at 229 pounds...CO-HOLDER OF THE UHWA TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP...THE VRISU...MATTHEW ENGEL!!!
(He slides beneath the bottom rope into the middle of the ring. He begins to warm-up for his upcoming match, awaiting the arrival of his opponent. )
Lopez: And finally...
(The lights in the arena all begin to meld into a dark gray color, one by one. Two red pyro's shoot down from the roof of the arena, hitting the stage....as "Voices" by Disturbed hits over the PA system. The two red pyro's hit the stage...igniting blue and red pyro's all along the stage, which also triggers the arena lights to sudden flash into a deep blue color...which pulses in and out, in a strobe light fashion. All of the gray fades as Thunderwolf walks out, hand in hand with his wife Misty....Thunderwolf has on a pair of baggy white cargo pants, coming right down to a pair of dark brown lugz boots. A black "AOWF" logoed T-shirt, w/ a wolf logo on the back, tucked into his baggy cargos. His hair gelled straight down. That prestigious smirk on his face. The AOWF Intercontinental Title lines his waist. A perfect fit, to an unperfect human being. The fans give a tremendous response as he leads his beautiful wife down to ringside. Blaze has on a pair of black leather pants, which lead into a a pair of Black boots. She also has on an orange spaghetti strap tank in the theme of halloween. A pumpkin earring in each other, with 24k diamonds for eyes...a light shade of make-up...a little bit of gray eyeshadow, and a light pink lip gloss....)
Lopez: To be accompanied to the ring by Blaze...From Cordova Alaska...weighing in at 198 pounds...he is the JWA TRANS ATLANTIC CHAMPION AND THE AOWF INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION...THUNDERWOLF!!!
(Thunderwolf reaches ringside....where he wraps his arms around his wifes waist, planting a nice kiss on her lips, nothing passionate in front of the fans, and fake like many wrestlers come out and attempt to do. He licks the reminants of her lip gloss off her lips, winking at her as he leaps up onto the apron...and hops over the top rope in one quick leap. He paces the wing, no taunts, awaiting Virus to come to the ring. He unstraps his title and hand sit out of the ring to his wife...and gets back into his ready stance...)
(The bell rings and we are underway. Thunderwolf and Nightstryker immediately jump at one another, and Thunderwolf goes to work on Stryker wheil Virus waits for him to turn around. Thunderwolf whips Stryker into the corner...and suddenly Stryker goes down hard halfway in between.)
Vans: What just happened?
Curtis: I believe that Nightstryker may have just hurt his knee there.
(Nightstryker slowly rolls to the outside, as paramedics come out to work on him. Thunderwolf stares down, as Virus jumps in and tries a school boy rollup...
1
2
Kickout!)
Vans: Somebody should tell Mr. Kelser how we do things in the UHWA!
Curtis: Maybe he should have talked with Ryan before the match began.
(Thunderwolf and Virus quickly lock up as the match continues and Nightstryker is helped to the back. Virus gets the advantage and bakcs T-Wolf into the corner. Virus kicks Wolf in the gut and then lays in some knife edge chops. Thunderwolf absorbs three of the chops before blocking Virus by the arm and pulling him in for a clothesline. Thunderwolf holds onto the arm then, and turns into an arm wrench. Wolf jumps up to the top rope holding onto the arm wrench, and then jumps into the air and does a 360 somersault, landing on his feet and using his momentum to take Virus down with a huge armtoss. Wolf then locks in a quarter nelson, working more on the arm.)
Curtis: Beautiful chain wrestling by the champ.
Vans: Virus needs to get back up off the mat. With Nightstryker gone this match is purely based on power.
(Thunderwolf holds the quarternelson, but Virus slowly gets to his feet and takes T-Wolf over with a snapmare takedown. Virus then goes over and delivers a standing moonsault to T-Wolf...going for the cover...
1
2
Kickout!
Virus picks up Thunderwolf and whips him into the ropes. He leapfrogs over Wolf and then catches him with a back elbow to the jaw. Virus runs into the ropes and tries a clothesline, but T-Wolf ducks it and catches him with an elbow to the gut. Thunderwolf takes a running leap away from Virus, waits for him to turn around, and then runs at him full speed. Wolf runs up Virus almost, and catches him with a huge kick to the brunt of the jaw. He then does a somersault and lands on his feet.)
Curtis: That...that was a Fiasca!
Vans: Where the hell did he learn THAT move?
(Wolf waits for Virus to slowly get up, and then runs into the ropes. He does a handspring bounce on the way back and delivers a huge dropkick that drops Virus. Thunderwolf then bounces off the ropes, does a cartwheel and jumps up at the end, landing with both feet on the chest of The Virus. Wolf uses Virus' chest as the equivalent of a trampoline and jumps up, does a moonsault in the middle of the air, and drops down on Virus, then goes for the pin.
1
2
Kickout!)
Curtis: I don't think Virus had any idea that this guy had this kind of style.
Vans: This is amazing!
(Thunderwolf picks up Virus and then slams him back down to the ground. He flips Virus over onto the ground and hooks in a full nelson, as if he were going to sit down on him with a full nelson camel clutch. Instead Thunderwolf summons up his strength and lifts Virus, lifting him high into the air and then dropping him back down with a huge Full Nelson Slam. Thunderwolf then goes for the pin...
1
2
Shoulder Up!)
Vans: How did Virus kick out of that!?
Curtis: Nice to see you attentive this time!
(Thunderwolf looks a little angry, when a huge roar comes up from the crowd. Ryan McCade slowly walks down from the backstage area.)
Curtis: Oh man...what's this. That's Thunderwolf's step-brother!
Vans: But that's also Virus' tag partner...who's side is he on?
(As Thunderwolf stares, Virus nails him from behind with a clothesline. Virus then locks in a crossface chickenwing, and then summons all his strength and lifts Thunderwolf over with a chickenwing suplex. Virus then hooks Thunderwolf up as Wolf gets up in a Rock Bottom position. Virus jumps up with the move, but instead does not lift Thunderwolf and drops Thunderwolf's jaw onto Virus' arm. Virus then goes for the cover...
1
2
Kickout!)
Curtis: Thunderwolf showing some resiliance here as well.
Vans: Is McCade still going to help anyone?!
Curtis: I thought McCade was shorter than that.
Vans: It doesn't matter...still looks like McCade to me.
(Virus grabs Thunderwolf and whips him into the corner. Virus follows in and jumps up, hooking onto Thunderwolf's head. Virus then jumps back with a huge DDT out of the corner. Virus then goes for the cover again...
1
2
Kickout!)
Curtis: Amazing!
Vans: McCade is coming closer to ringside!
Curtis: Will you focus?
(Virus signals for the end and picks up Thunderwolf and drops him with The Depression in the center of the ring. Instead of going for the pinfall, Virus then climbs up to the top rope and sets him up, and nails him with The Cash Splash!!!)
Vans: NEW CHAMPION! NEW CHAMPION!
(Virus goes for the cover...
1
2
Thrrr...NO!!!)
Vans: WHAT?!
Curtis: Oh that was so close!
(Virus looks at the ref amazingly and slams the mat in frustration. Virus goes over and picks up Thunderwolf, who catches him with a small package...
1
2
Kickout!
Virus then quickly drops Wolf with a clothesline afterward. Virus whips Thunderwolf into the ropes, but Thunderwolf reverses and catches Virus with a Samoan Drop on the way back. Thunderwolf goes for the cover...
1
2
Shoulder Up!
Thunderwolf slowly gets to his feet, as does Virus. Wolf hooks up Virus in an impaler position and then lifts him up. He jumps up in the middle of the ring and drills Virus with a vertebreaker! He then goes for the cover...
1
2
Thrrr...NO!!!)
Curtis: It's still not over!
Vans: W'eve still got a shot!
(Thunderwolf and Virus each slowly get to their feet and Virus goes over and hooks up a waistlock. Virus lifts Thunderwolf and nails him with a German Suplex, holds onto it and rolls through. Virus then nails Wolf with another German Suplex and again rolls through. Virus tries on more German, this time a release, but Wolf adjusts the weight and flips up, and lands on his feet. As Virus gets up, Wolf hooks up Virus and drills him with the Cry of the Wolf! He then goes for the cover...
1
2
3!!!)
DING DING DING!
Lopez: Here is your winner...and STILL AOWF Intercontinental Champion...THUNDERWOLF!!!!
Curtis: What a match that was, in the end Thunderwolf was a little too much for Virus. But a great effort by both men.
Vans: And here comes McCade to congratulate Wolf...
Curtis: WAIT! THAT'S NOT MCCADE IT'S...
(Quickly, the man dives in the ring and clocks Thunderwolf with a tire iron in the face. The man...is Richard Miller of the JWA. Richard smiles down at Thunderwolf, as he points down at him and delivers trash talking. From behind comes Blaze with right hands to Miller's back, which stagger him for a minute. Eventually Richard catches Blaze, both arms, and holds them there, smiling. Blaze tries to get away, but Richard forces himself down and kisses her. Blaze breaks away and slaps Richard right in the face, to which Richard smiles and grabs Blaze by the hair. He slams her down to the mat, and looks to hook her in his 4th Degree submission hold, when out of nowhere comes Ryan McCade to save Thunderwolf. Richard goes running out through the crowd, smiling as he does.)
Curtis: Oh man...this isn't even the JWA and the issue between T-Wolf and the MoA continues!
[Michael Swarts is backstage, in TEDs dressing room. Duck sits in the corner with Jennelle and Buttercup, with an Ice pack on his shoulder. TED is at the side of the room, with Gemma and Heyleigh talking to him]
GEMMA: Come on TED, we need to go.
TED: I don't want to... I want to be with Abby.
GEMMA: You need to go, so you CAN see her.. if you don't wrestle, you'll get fined, you wont be able to pay hospital fees.
TED: Whatever.
GEMMA: I give up...
HEYLEIGH: ooh... I know what will work.... *cough cough*... I say, cheer up old chap, pip pip and all that malarky. You may be smitten with the young lass, and worried about her, but you need to go give some gentleman a jolly good thrashing right now.
TED: ...
HEYLEIGH: You're not gonna tell me off?
TED: ...
HEYLEIGH: oh come on! Slap me at least?
TED:...
HEYLEIGH: Well bugger ya then!
[Michael gets closer to TED]
MICHAEL: Excuse me ladies...
TED, we've had word that you're not coming out to ringside, and from the looks of it, we were not miss-informed. Can you explain your reasoning to the thousands in attendance who you'll be letting down?
TED: Just don't want to... ok?
MICHAEL: There has to be a better reason, TED.
TED: Cause I'm worried, ok?
MICHAEL: about what? Losing? Your friend?
TED: Yes, losing my friend. Right now, I've got all this anger in me... voice inside my head telling me to go out and kick everyones ass. I know that's what I have to do. I need the paycheck. I've got a big bill to pay. I know for Abbys sake I need to go out there...
MICHAEL: But...?
TED: What if I lose Abby, while I'm in the ring? I want to be with her at all times.
HEYLEIGH: Oh... that's why? Oh TED you have nothing to worry about.
TED: You don't know that.
HEYLEIGH: I do... don't, you're right. But um, Duck has his phone... and if anything happens, we'll know.
GEMMA: Yeah, if anything happens, you'll know right away... I'm sure you can leave the match if you have good reason, forfeit your title and all to rush back to her. But TED, don't forfeit now, and lose your best chance at paying her bills.
TED: I guess you're right.
[TED stands up, and puts his title around his waist, as he sighs heavily]
GEMMA: Lets go then... they've got your entrance all ready.
TED: Tell em not to bother... I'm not in the mood for that stuff right now.
[TED puts his shades on, pushes past Michael and leaves the room. Gemma and Heyleigh stares at each other for a second, and then follow.]
MICHAEL: Well, I guess TEDs not going to be in the best mindstate for this match... Brent, Christopher... I throw
DUCK: TED will be fine...
MICHAEL: huh?
DUCK: Trust me... TED's going to be more than happy when that match starts.
MICHAEL: oh.. Well, Chris.. Brent.. with that, I guess I send it back to you.
WORLD TITLE MATCH!!!!
Curtis: Well there you see it ladies and gentlemen...the huge structure that is Battlecade. We've been working up to this for quite some time...four men...one title...
Lopez: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...THIS...IS OUR MAIN EVENT...AND IT IS INSIDE BATTLECADE! The winner will be the first man to pin all of the other participants...and he will be the UHWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! INTRODUCING FIRST...
("Crazy Train" by Ozzy Osbourne hits the PA as Black Jack Bowers makes his way out with a chorus of boos. He raises his cowbell into the air and yells to the crowd at the entranceway, before walking to the ring. Jack climbs into the ring and raises his cowbell with a yell again, before he takes off his cowboy hat and places his cowbell and rope in the corner as Crazy Train fades. )
Lopez: From Austin Texas...weighing in at 320 pounds...BLACK JACK BOWERS!!!
Curtis: The only man to be in all four previous Battlecade matches...Black Jack has the experience in this match.
Vans: But at his old age, does he have the stamina?
(("Get Yourself Connected" by Stereo MCs comes on the PA. Moke Doshky comes out to a loud chorus of boos. He ignores the fans and walks to the ring.)
Lopez: To be accompanied to the ring by The Fantastic Andy Strickland...from Bonn, Germany...weighing in at 275 pounds...MOKE DOSHKEY!!!
Curtis: Moke has had a little bit of trouble since losing the NA Title.
Vans: I don't think he stands much of a chance.
(("The theme from Killer Instinct" hits as an aqua green spotlight flashes over the arena. From the backstage area comes Jimmy Allen, dressed in his wrestling attire and a leather vest over his chest. Jimmy slaps the fans hands on the way to ringside, before stepping into the ring and walking to all four corners, saluting the crowd as he does.)
Lopez: From Tulsa Oklahoma...weighing in at 240 pounds...JIMMY ALLEN!!!!
Curtis: Here's my pick...
Vans: With TED as distracted as he is...who knows?
Lopez: And finally...
[the lights dim as "Vampire" by Bif Naked starts blasting out from the PA System, as a spotligh focuses on the rafters above the entranceway. No one is there. The spotlight turns off, as the lights to the arena come back up, and through the entrance way walk TED and the girls. TED not even in his jacket, just straight wrestling gear, with his shades on his face, and his title around his waist.He walks down to the ring, looking rather glum.]
[As he reaches the ring, he takes off his shades, gives them to Heyleigh. Takes off his belt, and hands it to Gemma, and then gets into the ring. Taking time to look at the steal cage, and his opponents as he awaits the start of this gruelling match]
Lopez: To be accompanied to the ring by Gemma and Heyleigh...from Birmingham, England...weighing in at 217 pounds...the UHWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION...THE ETERNALLY DAMNED!!!
[all 4 men in the ring, staringeach other down, itching to get going... when all the lights go out.]
BRENT: Great, a power cut... just what we need.
[Through the PA system a faint humming can be heard. Followed by a feminine voice]
"I'm here for you"
[on the video screen, a picture slowly fades in of a slaughterhouse. Various animals, hung up and skinned. Blood dripping from them. The lights to the entrance way fade in, and over the entrance way, a constant stream of blood-like liquid flows] [Behind that, a very large, very dead cow, is lowered to the floor, standing vertical] [A meat cleaver rips through the top of the cow, and slices straight down.] [The cleaver disapears, as the intro to "poem" by Taproot starts up... as the intro ends, and the first lyric is sounds, a huge explosion goes off centre stage... and the cow breaks open... revealing Psychoduck holding the cleaver, and next to him, stands Abattoir... using Duck to help keep her up] [With the music blaring, and the lights in the arena coming back up, the two of them walk through the streams of blood, Abattoirs white sweater turning a pale crimson as she does so]
CHRIS: That's Abattoir! That's why Duck was sure TED would be happy.
BRENT: I knew it... I just knew Duck had a plan. The guys a genius.
[As Duck and Abby walk down to join Gemma and Heyleigh, the song fades out.]
(In the ring, TED stands smiling, before being blindsided by Moke who isn't going to stand around and watch any longer. As TED hits the floor, Allen and Jack turn their focus to the ring, and begin waging theire own little war. The bell rings and we are under way. Bowers and Allen in one ring...Moke backs TED into the corner and begins to pound away on him. Moke whips TED into the corner and follows him in with a huge splash. And as he does, he quickly goes over to the other ring and helps Bowers pound away on Allen. )
Curtis: Maybe an alliance here between Bowers and Moke?
(As soon as Bowers and Moke beat down Allen, Moke celebrates...and then Bowers blindsides him from behind. Bowers then goes over and grabs Allen, and continues to beat on him a little bit, drilling him with rights and lefts till he sinks down into the corner. Then from behind, TED jumps in and nails Bowers with a baseball bat right to the back. He then goes over to Moke and starts to beat down on him. Allen and Bowers go off and begin to fight amongst themselves once again.)
Curtis: The old issue between Black Jack Bowers and Jimmy Allen is apparently still remaining.
Vans: And TED is going Alcatraz on Moke, look at him go!
(As Black Jack and Allen battle at one side of the ring, TED is laying a beating on Moke. Moke is struggling to stand, as he taggers around, and drops down in the corner of the ring. Some cogs seem to turn in TED's head. He grabs himself a table, and lies it across the top ropes where the two rings are next to each other. He calls over to Jack and Allen, who ignore him. TED runs over to them and splits them up. He points over at Moke and says something. Allen and Jack seem to be in agreement with TED. TED walks back to where the table is, goes to the cage, and starts to climb to the top. Meanwhile, Black Jack and Allen lay some more punches on Moke. Satisfied with their work, they pick Moke up and lie him across the table. TED stands atop the cage, he looks down at Moke and prepares for a splash. But then he turns around and looks down, outside the cage, at his girl. He smiles, turns his back to the ring. Take a deep breath, and delivers a murderous twisting senton to Moke, straight through the table, with further contortion caused by the ropes. Both men lie motionless. Black Jack grabs TED from the wreckage, and goes for the pin. Allen makes the save with a kick to the head, he then jumps on the crumpled body of Moke, but this time Jack makes the save. )
Curtis: Now they can't decide who to pin!
Vans: Uh oh...they may but their differences aside here!
(Bowers and Allen shake hands for a moment, and then Allen pins the backbroken TED and Bowers grabs Moke and both go for the pin...
1
2
3!!!
Then Bowers and Allen switch places, and go for the pin again...
1
2
3 (Allen gets the pin on Moke)
1
2
Kickout!!! (Bowers does not get the pin on TED)
Bowers tries for the pin on TED again, but Allen stops him and starts to beat on Jack. All the meanwhile, TED crawls over and goes for the cover on Moke...
1
2
3!!!)
Curtis: Moke has been pinned by all three men...but more importantly all Jimmy has to do is pin Black Jack Bowers and he has won the match!!!
Vans: Oh man come on TED!!!
(TED goes over and notices that Allen and Bowers continue to fight, and TED slowly finds a place to rest. As he does, Moke slowly gets up and gets back to work, beating on the other two men. TED enjoys his break. The others notice this, and start making their way towards him, still battling with each other. TED runs off the ropes, towards the other ring, does a cartwheel, followed by a handspring, into a moonsault which sends him up and onto the top ropes, horizontally, his body lying across the two top ropes, he springs off them and lifts his chest up a little and hits Black Jack with a backspring elbow varation, as Moke and Allen move out of the way. )
Curtis: Nice move by TED!
(Then out of nowhere, Jimmy knocks out Moke with a Superkick! Moke is out cold. Jimmy then goes over and starts to pound away on TED to put him away. Jimmy goes to the cage and finds a sack, and empties the thumbtacks onto the ground. He goes over to TED and starts to unload punch after punch on him. TED tries to fight back, but Jimmy out fights him, and then drops him with an Atomic Drop. Jimmy runs up the cage and stops midway, waiting for TED to get up. Jimmy leaps off the cage and turns in mid air, catching TED with a crossbody block. As he does this, Black Jack Bowers goes over and finds a specialty table. He takes the table off and sets it up. Jimmy sees this and goes over to Black Jack and starts to pound on him. Bowers is able to nail him with a hammer blow to the back of the head, and then set him up near the table!)
Curtis: Oh no...Brent you know what that table is rigged to do!!!
Vans: You've got to be kidding me!!!
(Bowers drills Jimmy down with the 52 Card Pickup onto the table, the table that was rigged to explode with C4 explosives!!! Bowers then goes for the pinfall admist the debris!
1
2
3!!!)
Curtis: Bowers is now one pinfall away, and with the condition TED is in...he may do it!!!
Vans: This is amazing!
(Bowers goes over and TED meets him. Black Jack and TED grapple, Jack overpowering TED throws him into the corner. Jack charges in at TED, but TED uses the ropes to lift himself up ad leap frog over Jack. TED picks a chair up off the mat, and smacks Jack across the back. Jack stumbles into the turnbuckles, TED hits him again, and again, and again. The chair contorting all the while. TED drops the chair, and struggles as he lifts Jack up onto the turnbuckle. With Jack left prone, TED gets the chair and loops it up and over Jacks head, so the ack rest part is covering Jacks nose, and the actual seat, is on Jacks shoulder blades. TED walks as far into the corner as possible, turns to face the centre of the wing he's in, puts his arms under Jacks armpits, lifts him up and little, and falls forward, slamming Jack down and smashing his face in the chair. As Jack lays bloodied, TED looks at his entorage, who all look psychotically happy with the move. TED then goes for the cover...
1
2
3!!!)
Vans: Now TED just has to pin Jimmy Allen!
Curtis: Allen has to pin Bowers!
Vans: Bowers has to pin TED!
Curtis: And Moke...
Vans: Moke is still out cold.
(TED goes over to Jimmy Allen and starts to pound away on him. TED hooks him up, and nails him with a T-Bone Suplex. TED then nails him with a release German Suplex from one ring to the other. TED then bounces off the ropes, takes a running jump and leaps in between the two rings and catches Jimmy with a legdrop and goes for the cover...
1
2
Kickout!
TED gets to his feet, but Bowers meets him as a bloody mess. Bowers backs TED into the corner and starts to pound away on TED, but TED counters with a thumb to the eye. TED grabs a tazer from the ring ropes and nails Bowers with it, causing him to slump down into the corner. TED goes over and tries to get Jimmy...but is intercepted amazingly by Moke Doshkey who locks him in the Mokey Squash for a moment...and then throws him into the steel cage with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Moke goes over and pins Bowers then...
1
2
3!!!)
Vans: Now Moke is two away...he could do it!
Curtis: That would be the upset of the century!
(Moke goes over, only to be nailed with one more superkick from Jimmy Allen. Jimmy quickly goes over and tries to pin Bowers...
1
2
Kickout!!!
Jimmy tries again, but TED stops him.
